If I were looking for a dog that was good with kids, I would get one that was already proven good with kids. I'd be looking at a rescue (of whatever breed) but very specifically a rescue or re homing situation where the dog is looking for a home because of circumstances that have nothing to do with the dog's behaviour. (owner going into an apartment or nursing home, or some such, and can't keep the dog) You want a dog that is good in the house and good with kids. Not impossible in a Basenji, but not the "average" one, either.
IMHO, what you don't want is a pup. Kids are not kind to puppies, and often the result is a nasty bite when the pup is old enough to retaliate. I realize I am generalizing here, but I well remember when we got a Sheltie when I was seven years old. Of course, I teased the dog. But when I came crying "Daddy, the dog bit me" my father's immediate response was "What did you do to the dog?" No sympathy for me! And I learned to avoid the behaviour that had prompted the bite. But really, it's better to avoid the whole issue, and get an older, settled dog that tolerates kids and their behaviour.
Coat color won't matter as much as temperment. Find one that suits your personality and that of your kids. I have a R&W and B&W they are both beautiful dogs. My RW is sweet and loving but does not like kids at all (she nips them, I think she is afraid of them) and my BW boy loves kids but is a little food aggressive and definatley is dominant. Find temprement over color.
I don't want to be a downer here…but I think you should think about this for a while. I get the feeling that a Basenji might not be the right dog for you...and I think you should definitely meet several individuals and talk to many responsible breeders before you decide. They are not 'normal' dogs...and they can be very frustrating and naughty. A Basenji isn't the kind of the dog that you get because their charcteristics fit the specifics that you or your spouse want/need. You have to really find that you love all quirks of the breed...or at least love the breed enough that you can get past the quirks... 
Good luck, and let us know how it goes...
Andrea might be right that you wait until you child is a bit older. B's are very 2 yr oldish and you sure don't need 2 of those ages running around.
I agree, you should definitely meet some basenjis and breeders before making a decision. The one thing I wish I had done before rescuing mine was to actually meet a few ahead of time. It gives you a better idea of how they really are (it's one thing to read about destructive habits, and another to come home to the destruction your little bundle of joy has caused) and how very different they all are.
Thanks. That is what I have been reading is there are not a ton of Basenji's and not available all over. Ill probably be looking at driving around 4 hours just to look at one when the time comes. But to get a well bred k9 that is from a respectable breeder that knows what to do and be able to tell more about the tempermant is worth the drive.
But thanks for the info about maybe getting an older Basenji, I have always got pups right at 6 weeks. But I will definately look into a young adult or so around a year old.
Jonny I think Ill probably be waiting awhile to get a basenji. Already have one going through terrible 2's dont know I can take another right now ha ha. But a Basenji sounds like a K9 that is for me. Hopefully. I was trying to find which markings I like better Black and white coat or red and white. But they both are excellent looking!
You will find with most all Basenji Breeders the pups do not leave until at least 8wks and more like 10wks. 6 wks in any breed is just to young to be removed from its littermates and Mom/other adults.
And Basenji are good with children as long as the children are respectfully of the dog. Basenjis do not do well with "wild" children. And keep in mind that an open door is an invitation for a Basenji to dash out …. Basenjis have been lost to cars more then health issues.
I totally agree with Quercus, please think well about your decison. Visit with as many Basenjis and their owners as you can.
If you were in this country I would invite you and particularly your wife together with the children to come and visit my Basenjis as often as possible before making any decisions. I'm sure this is true of all responsible breeders.
Welcome to the forum and I do hope you find a good home for your Mali.
In fact, responsible breeders insist on meeting the entire family when placing pups. While you might have some in the family on board, some may not be… and unless you see how they interact with the pups/dogs you would never know.
And I agree with Quercus post, it was right on!
Before you consider another dog (and I utterly think a Basenji is wrong for you–a Basenji is a full time FAMILY dog that will often destroy and find ways to drive your not-pet-oriented wife to distraction)-- why not get a behaviorist in and try to fix the Malinois issue? Why not figure out where you and your wife failed to provide adequate supervision and training of both toddler and dog and figure out a way to keep the child safe and the dog alive.
Because right now, your only options are to do that, or euthanize the dog. You cannot place a dog that nipped a child no matter the situation. And if you put the dog in an outside kennel and spent the time and energy with it that it needs, your wife is not going to be happy. And if you place the dog and it hurts someone, they can (and should) sue you into the next century. Commit to the dog and getting it right if possible.
I don't want to be a downer here…but I think you should think about this for a while. I get the feeling that a Basenji might not be the right dog for you...and I think you should definitely meet several individuals and talk to many responsible breeders before you decide. They are not 'normal' dogs...and they can be very frustrating and naughty. A Basenji isn't the kind of the dog that you get because their charcteristics fit the specifics that you or your spouse want/need. You have to really find that you love all quirks of the breed...or at least love the breed enough that you can get past the quirks...
^ This…
Especially since you are used to a serious working breed like Mal...
Our Watson is pretty mellow by basenji standards, but even he is a quirky, little comedian. If bored he will come up with his own interpretations of commands given.
It is true that they are not barkers, but that does not necessarily mean they are always quiet. Other than the famous baroo there are grumbles, mumbles, yowls, howls, chortles, and even shrieks they can make depending on the situation.
When Watson is displeased he has a "little" song that he will sing for us to share the misery... I am amused, but not every person would be.
They are rather clean, but they do like to entertain themselves by for example taking tissue and shredding it into itty-bitty pieces all over a room (hooray ticker tape parade)...it does not sound like your wife would appreciate such high-jinx?
Me I love a quirky dog with a bit of attitude...if that is what you are looking for and something you think your wife can deal with then a basenji is a good choice...
Thank You everyone for your input. I have done a lot more research on the forum and web since I posted yester day and I do want a basenji because well I like a dog with its own attitude, but I think I may be waiting longer than I was originally hoping. I was looking at like 2 or 3 years down the road but I think it will be 5 or 6 now, that way my son will be 7-8 and which should help with teaching him how to interact with the basenji and yes I would definately be spending time with the pup and breeder before actually getting one since I have never been around them before. I have cleaned up plenty of messes from the mali and well thats just part of having a dog. She used to sleep in the bed with me and I have had to replace pillow cases even comforters from where she would chew at night. I still want a basenji but like I said it will be down the road a ways. My best friends dad has wanted a shar pei for 20 years and has gotten 2 in the last year. So doesnt matter if you really want the dog you'll get it in time.
Debra yes some may do the training but I am not going to risk it. She nipped him in the face while he was just sitting on the floor doing nothing. And I am not going to risk his face/life. She is a 1 owner kinda dog unfortunately absolutely best dog when its just me and her, and I do love her but not going to risk her doing that again.
I actually have a friend that is retired Wildlife Officer and now part-time with my dept. He travels all over the country to put on classes at confrences for tracking and cadaver, some narcotics. He is thinking about taking her or trying to place her as a working dog.
A basenji is a big dog in a small, fabulous body. They want to be treated respectfully, and they will respect you in turn. But they do need a firm, kind and loving leader.
When people ask me about kids and basenjis, I usually ask, "If the kid is chasing the dog or hurting an ear, and the dog gives a corrective nip–no blood or puncture, just a 'leave me alone' nip, do you consider that a bite?" If they say, yes of course and I could not tolerate that, I tell them that most basenjis would not be right for you. They are 'fair' and may give a grrr or nip to another basenji or to the kid, if cornered or frustrated. But attack for no reason and chew their face...never heard of such with a basenji. Many years ago a basenji of mine appeared to bite my grandson, my son used great restraint and didn't drop-kick my dog, and when we looked at the child, there was not a mark to be seen. But we saw the strike and the child screamed. The dog just had excellent mouth control and did a "could have had you, now behave" move. And the 2 year old child DID respect all the dogs after that.
My Nicky was evidently raised with kids, she loves them...for their toys and for low-held food. My friend Ginny was raised with basenjis and raised her 2 boys with basenjis in the house, but she is a "what did you do to the dog?" person. And her sons always put away their shoes and toys if they wanted to use them again!
Basenjis are perpetual toddlers, so I would not consider getting one, even a nice mellow adult, till your boy is 7 or 8, old enough to participate in care and training, and to really understand mutual respect.
They are my favorite breed, obviously, but they are not usually a 'lay on me, beat on me, pull my ears' dog !
Glad you are waiting. But if you were actively watching and the child actually was not interacting with the dog and it bit him, put the dog down. The dog is not safe anywhere.
I find Basenjis are quite individual in their attitude to kids. My first would never have bitten anyone, no matter the provocation. My second would warn an adult who had the temerity to try moving her out of a comfortable spot, but would tolerate young children with great patience. I caught my two nieces…..ages probably 4 and 6 at the time.....fighting over possession of the dog.....literally one at each end, trying to pull her apart! And she didn't say a word! But when they were older, they lost their "special status" and she would warn them if they bugged her. (I think the only person she ever bit was me......in an altercation over a hole she was digging to China. Yeah, I lost my patience and suffered the consequences. I would call it a draw. I got bit and she quit digging.....permanently, at least for that location. ) Of my other three Basenjis, one was fine with kids, the other two I wouldn't trust.
Dogs raised with kids are supposed to be better, and perhaps they are......depending on the kids they were raised with! 
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We adopted a Basenji who had only ever lived outside and with one lady owner. He was a very tolerant dog but just didn't appreciate being ordered around by my 4 sons. He would wait until they turned their backs and 'bite' into the air!
