A new dog in the house

[Forever Amber]

My son moved home with his female lab/border mix, Lizzy a few days ago she is about 1 1/2 yrs old. My B zoe is 11 months. So far things havent been too bad, just alot of growling and snapping on zoes part. They play alot and mostly they get along. At night though zoe will get more agressive and turn on lizzy. Though she looks vicious she hasnt actually bitten down. Usually when I'm not working night time is when I curl up with zoe and read or watch tv. I'm not sure if she is jealous of this time or what because Lizzy has attached herself to me. Often she is fine with Lizzy around then out of the blue she will jump between one of us (my daughter, husband or me) and Lizzy growling and snapping. I figure since she isnt hurting lizzy I should just let them try and find their way for now, but hubby keeps interfering. I dont know how long my son will be home but i'm thinking at least a year. Just wondering if this sounds hopeless for the two or given time can things get better. Is this how it usually goes when you introduce a new dog to the house? Any advise is welcome, encouragement even more welcome, and for those who can tell me everything is going to fine, I'll roll out the red carpet for you.

[AJs Human]

Snarking among bitches is common. Zoe has been queen of the roost since she can remember. It's difficult for her to give up what she sees as her territory. If they are already playing together most of the time, they should be able to settle in together. They have to figure it out between themselves, but if it looks like someone is going to get hurt, you will have to intervene.

If your son has a crate for Lizzie and you have one for Zoe, if they appear to be on the verge of murder, I suggest you crate them both so it doesn't look like one is favored over another. That is your message that you, as leader, will not tolerate that sort of behavior from either of them.

[lvoss]

What is exactly the situation when Zoe does this? Is Lizzy moving around the room looking for a place to lay down? Is Zoe moving around?

[Forever Amber]

To start we do have crates for them both and they have both been trained to it. Zoe seldom has do go into her crate when we are home. Liz I think was crated too much (I know, my son! but I wouldnt call him the best pet owner) I cant help but feel sorry for Liz.

Lizzy wants to play constantly she seems more like the puppy then zoe so zoe will just let her know its enough which doesnt seem like such a big deal. But the worst is I cant call zoe or zoe cant even come to me on her own without Lizzy butting in. (The dog has to be at someones feet all the time nudging for attention) Sometimes this is fine but sometimes Zoe just cant stand it and will start growling as she sits in my lap if I try to keep petting her and hold her there it just gets worse until I let her down so she can force liz away. But I'm not sure just letting her get away with the growling in my lap is a good idea either. Just this moment she is warning Liz away from my daughter who was petting zoe.
At night zoe sleeps with me. The cat used to sleep with us until we let zoe in the bed so for 7 months now he hasn't tried to get into the bed until now whether its Lizzy being in the house (though she is crated at night) Or the weather getting cold again the cat 2 nights ago decided he wanted back into the bed. Soon as Zoe feels him jump up on the bed she jumps up growling but will settle when she finds out its the cat. We dont let Lizzy on the bed and kick her out of our room when she tries to come in.
I can feed them together as long as Lizzy finishes hers first if zoe finishes first zoe will move in and try to take from liz this by the way is the only time lizzy will fight back. Wondering if I should crate them when I feed them now. Zoe and the cat are used to getting fed together right after zoe and I get back from our walk. Which btw zoe also has to share. Which she seems fine with because this is the only time she never growls at lizzy.
My son moved into the attic. I couldnt stand it any more this morning so I brought her up to him. I just feel like we got liz dumped on us and he is letting me do all the work with her. I just cant not take liz for a walk with us because I'm sure that is the only walk she will get. I hate to admit this about my own son. He and his girlfriend got the dog together and now they broke up (man we were hoping she would take Lizzy with her) and she moved back to her home state Maryland.

[Forever Amber]

Ok its been 10 days since lizzy joined us and things are settling. Growling seems less aggressive. If zoe is in my lap she will let lizzy get attention most times if we are on the couch but almost never when zoey and I are on the computer chair, but the growling isnt as ernest she doesnt snarl visciously more of a warning off.
I hope part of the problem isnt me? Do you think zoe feels my resentment. I feel horrible Lizzy is such a sweet lovable dog but I just dont feel connected. I pet her because she asks me with her eyes and I feel guilty. I walk her because I know she needs it (I bought a gentle leader for her so now the pulling isnt bad).
But I dont feel love for the dog, just slight affection. Shes smart I have taught her a few tricks zoe Knows and she really does learn fast, she so wants to please sooo much I just feel like a total jerk for not loving this dog.

[Rita Jean]

Give it time if Lizzy and son are there for a year I bet your going be in love with Lizzy before the year is up. Then your going to hate to see her leave. Your not a jerk just need time and you are caring for her is that not love in it's way? Happy all is going so well.

Rita Jean

[nomrbddgs]

How are things going?

[Forever Amber]

Zoey still growls but I expected that. I see my sons dog but not my son. In fact she is laying at my feet as I type this. Its not even been 2 wks yet so I guess by the end of 30 days we will all be settled in.

[nomrbddgs]

Too bad for the dog though. Hopefully all will settle down further as time goes on.