@Nexa:
The pack dynamic in our house is pretty simple: Our female Nexa can do whatever she wants whenever she wants to. If she wants to grumble at Leo she does. Our male Leo is not to retaliate at all to Nexa. The second he does it escalates, although usually it's not a big deal. Leo is pretty laid back so most of the time this works out just fine.
I'm sorry to hear about the fight - a bad fight is always a little scary and unnerving. Glad Leo is ok.
FWIW, it sounds like your pack dynamic is very much on point to what mine is - so I can relate :rolleyes:. In my house, Ruby rules the roost. Ruby is exactly the same way with Brando…thankfully, Brando is like Leo - laid back - until he can't take Ruby's crap anymore. In my case though, Ruby is spayed and Brando is intact.
Additionally I have the added excitement of Ruby defending Aaliyah when Liyah and Brando have a squabble. Any noise from Liyah and Ruby is right on the spot to see if Liyah needs any help - Ruby sees it as her opportunity to get after Brando. When that happens, I usually intervene - I don't care if Liyah and Brando try to work out their difference, but I don't want Ruby using it to take a pot shot at Brando.
Liyah is due to go into heat any time now. Obviously I won't be seeing if Liyah is nasty to Brando, but I'll be curious to see if she is nasty to Ruby. Up to this point, Liyah has never ever talked back to Ruby - no matter how harsh Ruby's correction, so I'm hopeful that she continues to respect her when the heat begins. I will say that if she goes off on Ruby, it won't be good - so I'll be watching that dynamic carefully. Your post is a good reminder of that, so thank you!