Carrie,
Our stories are very similar, my husband was set on a Basenji or a Pharoah Hound. I read up on the Basenji and became terrified about them, everything I read said that they were destructive, could not be trusted out of the kennel if left alone, etc. I read one site that had a section is a Basenji right for you and it just scared me. I just had such a uneasy feeling about it. Now, understand that I am a dog amature, we had just got our first dog a few months prior and were looking to add a second.
This is the part of the story that I don't feel extremely proud of, while at the mall I walked into the Petstore and there was a Basenji puppy. I took her out and played with her and feel in love, I could not believe that this adorable little creature could grow horns and destroy my house. I put her back and left with a little bit better of a feeling about the breed. A month later my husband came back from travel and we walked back into the pet store and she was still there so we adopted her. I don't regret it at all.
There are some major differences with this breed then any other but IMHO I think some of them could happen with other dogs too. You HAVE to crate a Basenji, you need to think of them like a two year old child, would you leave a two year old child alone in a room for 10 minutes? Not unless you want fingerpaint all over your walls and crayon on the floor.
The crate is not a torture item, dogs are pack animals and the crate is like a safe haven to them. This took me a while to get over with out first dog, I felt bad that he was cooped up all day in this "jail cell" while I was at work, don't feel that way. My two willingly go into their crates and sometimes they hang out together in one.
As for sleeping with you, you can do that my Basenji is such a cuddler even if I am sleeping on the couch she is right there with me.
I attribute Zahra's potty training problems with the fact that she came from a petstore and was there for a while. I have read on here that there are some that get it right away.
I have really gotten into the breed since we got her, we go lure coursing, people stop us all the time to ask about the breed. It is so cool because of how special they are.
I would say that a Basenji is going to be more of a challenge then your dog that you have now, one because he is already trained and knows the rules so don't let that frustrate you when you bring home your Basenji. You just need to treat your Basenji like a two year old, the best thing I read on this forum that describes a Basenji is "a two year old in a fursuit". When you are owned by a Basenji you become part of a unique club, you learn to have a more watchful eye, build higher fences and laugh about things that a labrador dog owner would never have to experience (Yodeling or Barrrroooooooing because you take one dog for a walk and leave the Basenji behind - WARN YOUR NEIGHBORS! LOL!)
Good luck, hope this helps.
Jenn